I'm happy to report that I successfully completed my last chemo treatment on 3/3/15! It was delayed for 1-week due to being sick, but after a round of antibiotics, a LOT of rest, and calling in the grandmas for reinforcement because I had to stay away from the baby, I was up and running again and able get my 12th and final Taxol. This is a big milestone and I'm excited to finish up because it has NOT been easy! Here's a glimpse of what February was like:
Chemo every Tuesday. My port mostly cooperated and my labs were stable each week. The side effects definitely worsened with each treatment. People always ask how I'm doing and since I don't want to subject them to a laundry list of ailments, I usually just respond with "I'm feeling great!" because it's just easier that way. But for those of you who are curious, here are the things I've typically been whining about to my husband (someone please give him a medal and/or a beer)...
-back/neck/shoulder/everywhere aches: Like whoa. I'm talking about a kind of deep, throbbing ache that makes it hard to concentrate on anything else because the discomfort is so annoying. At times I feel it from my teeth to my toes. It settles in for most of the week (except wonderful, glorious, Wednesdays, when the steroids are in my system and provide some temporary relief. Thank you Lord for steroids!)
-hot flashes: thanks a lot, steroids.
-Everything I eat or drink has a weird slimy aftertaste. And in general, stuff just tastes a little off.
-stomach/digestive issues that like to happen suddenly and urgently. This is extra super exciting when you aren't home.
-headaches
-fatigue...by the end of the day, all I want is to lay down with a heating pad (best $30 I ever spent since this whole mess began). This is heavenly, but then a hot flash occurs and I become a raging biatch.
-bloody noses (something to do with the Taxol drying out your sinuses)
-half of my toenails are black and blue, which I didn't notice until I took the nail polish off :)
-half of my toenails are black and blue, which I didn't notice until I took the nail polish off :)
-neuropathy: I've been dropping things a lot because I've lost some feeling in my hands, mostly my right hand. Sometimes it feels like little electric shocks or pinpricks.
-beginning symptoms of lymphedema: I had a lot of lymph nodes (43 to be exact) removed during surgery, and because of this, my right arm is at risk of developing lymphedema (painful swelling). Over the past several weeks, I've noticed some symptoms starting to occur. There's no "cure" for it, but it's a lot easier to manage if caught early, so I was referred for physical therapy. I put therapy on the back-burner last year when I found out it's a $300 co-pay for each visit (and they want you to go a few times per week). But, it needs to be done. I'm looking into a possible grant that might help cover the cost.
-"chemo brain": At times I feel like I can't put a sentence together, and have trouble finishing my thoughts. That's why this blog is helpful to me because I can type a little bit at a time and organize my thoughts :)
I think it's difficult for people to fully understand what this is like unless they've been through it. I have a whole new level of respect for anyone who's had chemo. It makes you an official bad ass, in my opinion. Bonus bad-ass points if you did it while pregnant (and I've learned that there are a lot of amazing women out there who have!) Now that I'm done with this phase of treatment, I'm anxious to start feeling more like myself again. I'm also hopeful that the side effects will start tapering off because the muscle aches and hot flashes have overstayed their welcome.
This is kind of a scary "in-between" time because chemo's been my
security blanket...it's made me feel like I'm actively doing something to kill
the cancer cells. I'll also miss the nurses who took such good care
of me for the past six months.
Two days after my final chemo, I met my radiation oncologist. She'll be taking the lead on the next phase of treatment, so we had an initial consultation in which she reviewed the details of my case and discussed her plan of attack. She recently met my medical oncologist when he presented my case at a monthly "tumor board" meeting held at the local hospital. So, she already had a full page of notes about me before we even met, and went over her notes to make sure she had everything correct. I was a little nervous about switching to a doctor in a completely different "network" (because this facility is closer to home), but it was clear that she did her homework and so far I'm feeling confident about my decision.
She explained that I'll have a total of 30 treatments, which equates to 5 days per week for 6 consecutive weeks. The radiation will target the entire chest wall on the right side, as well as areas above the collarbone, below the armpit, and across my entire mastectomy scar. The last five treatments will focus solely on the scar, because that's the area where recurrence is most likely.
Side effects include skin changes that will basically feel and look like a sunburn (on top of a sunburn, on top of a sunburn) and fatigue. Sometimes, radiation can graze the esophagus and cause trouble swallowing, or affect the lungs and cause shortness of breath. In rare cases, it can cause rib fractures, but my doctor's never seen it (though she knocked on wood to be safe).
A week later I returned to have what's called a "simulation". This involved a whole mess of stickers, paint, Sharpie markers, and even permanent tattoos (small dots) all over my chest. I was instructed to lay in a certain position and then had a CT scan. This will help ensure that the radiation is aimed in the correct areas. For each treatment, I'll lay in the same position, and the tattoos, stickers and paint will help the technicians line everything up correctly. The right side of my chest looks similar to this:
It'll take them a few days to finalize the treatment plan, and they'll call when they're ready to begin. So, right now I'm on "break" (but I use that term loosely...)
During the week when I was super sick, our sweet dog Charley started losing the ability to use his hind legs. This led to a 3-hour visit with the vet, who then referred us to another 3-hour visit with a veterinary neurologist. The neurologist performed a lackluster exam and then presented us with a $5,000 estimate if we wanted to find out what was wrong (and about $3,000 more to possibly fix it). Kthanksbyeeeeee.......
Now, I love my dog more than I love most people, but we're not exactly rolling in cash at the moment. We ultimately decided to try an approach recommended by our vet, which involves a lot of medication and about 6 weeks of strict movement restriction. We sectioned off a corner of our living room for Charley to stay in, and he was perfectly content...until we told him "goodnight" and headed upstairs for bed without him. This led to whining, howling, barking, and eventually plotting an escape from his area. So, Jeremy slept on the couch next to Charley for a week until we could figure something else out. We ended up getting a travel crate so Charley could safely be carried up/down the stairs and Jeremy could sleep in an actual bed. We've been doing this for the past week and so far it's working out nicely. But, he can't be left home alone so it's been a little tricky to always ensure that someone can be with him.
Now for some baby talk :)
Ben has been doing GREAT! He's approaching 4 months old now, and weighs over 12 lbs. He recently started sleeping through the night (we're talkin' anywhere from 8-12 hours...yay!) and when he wakes up he is SO HAPPY. When you walk into the room, he breaks into a big grin and can't contain himself. It's pretty much the best thing ever. He's been babbling a lot (still practicing his "I love you's") and is on the verge of having his first real laugh. He loves getting a bath, chewing on his hands, and laying on his changing table. He's not a huge fan of tummy time but we're working on it. Here are some pictures from the past month:
During the week when I was super sick, our sweet dog Charley started losing the ability to use his hind legs. This led to a 3-hour visit with the vet, who then referred us to another 3-hour visit with a veterinary neurologist. The neurologist performed a lackluster exam and then presented us with a $5,000 estimate if we wanted to find out what was wrong (and about $3,000 more to possibly fix it). Kthanksbyeeeeee.......
Now, I love my dog more than I love most people, but we're not exactly rolling in cash at the moment. We ultimately decided to try an approach recommended by our vet, which involves a lot of medication and about 6 weeks of strict movement restriction. We sectioned off a corner of our living room for Charley to stay in, and he was perfectly content...until we told him "goodnight" and headed upstairs for bed without him. This led to whining, howling, barking, and eventually plotting an escape from his area. So, Jeremy slept on the couch next to Charley for a week until we could figure something else out. We ended up getting a travel crate so Charley could safely be carried up/down the stairs and Jeremy could sleep in an actual bed. We've been doing this for the past week and so far it's working out nicely. But, he can't be left home alone so it's been a little tricky to always ensure that someone can be with him.
Now for some baby talk :)
Ben has been doing GREAT! He's approaching 4 months old now, and weighs over 12 lbs. He recently started sleeping through the night (we're talkin' anywhere from 8-12 hours...yay!) and when he wakes up he is SO HAPPY. When you walk into the room, he breaks into a big grin and can't contain himself. It's pretty much the best thing ever. He's been babbling a lot (still practicing his "I love you's") and is on the verge of having his first real laugh. He loves getting a bath, chewing on his hands, and laying on his changing table. He's not a huge fan of tummy time but we're working on it. Here are some pictures from the past month:
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| Love this smiley guy!! |
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| Lounging on his playmat |
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| Turtle Power! |
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| Snoozing with his aunt |
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| Going for a walk with Nana |
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| "Say ma, does these suspenders make me look smart?" |
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| Visiting Daddy's school for a "meet the baby" shower :) |
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| Shower treats |
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| Jerm's hair is longer than mine :/ |
Shout Outs
2. Lisa's
Army A great group of volunteers who deliver care packages for
people going through cancer treatments. My sister and I both received
care packages from Lisa's Army and continue to receive ongoing encouragement from them :)
3. Fundraiser for Debbie Elsasser
This is a fundraiser I recently started for my mother-in-law who is going
through a difficult time. In the spirit of paying it forward, please take
a look and help if you are able.
